Here are Uncle Joe's Takeaways for Week Two of the NFL Season:
- Ah yes, football’s most anticipated game of the regular season: The Toilet Bowl on Thursday Night Football! Too bad Joe Burrow couldn’t flush the Browns!
- Apparently “49ers” refers to the number of players who went to the medical tent on Sunday. I mean yikes! They sacrificed almost all of their starters to a team they could’ve beat with their secondary. Kaepernick had to make himself a second bowl of popcorn watching this all go down.
- Send your thoughts & prayers for anyone who had Saquon Barkley on their fantasy team. They weren’t ok last week and now they don't know what to do with themselves.
- Gronk left a TV deal with Fox for THIS? The Statue of Liberty put up better stats this week!
- Tom Brady is in familiar territory here: Playing against awful teams that make him look better than he actually is.
- My cousin from Philly decided to go camping in the Adirondacks this weekend instead of watching the Eagles play. Wise choice.
- With Heinz Field being empty, there’s now more yellow on my TV screen than an episode of The Simpsons.
- The Falcons have now proved their expertise in blowing leads! It’s just not just for the Super Bowl anymore! Be sure to pre-order your 20-0 shirts!
- Of course the Patriots would try to run it on the 1-yard line against the Seahawks and fail. Belichick must’ve been too busy shoving Subway footlongs in his mouth than coming up with a less predictable play call. Probably a better use of his time with Cam Newton at the helm.
- Who dat? Nobody knows anymore because almost every fan in New Orleans has disowned the Saints after last night. Who dat at quarterback? Drew Brees looked more like Drew Carey on the field. Their offense gives Sloppy Joe’s a bad name, I mean 129 penalty yards allowed? How? Only time will tell if what happened in Vegas will actually stay in Vegas. Maybe they’ll sober up by the time they face the Packers next week.
This week’s MVP is: The Philadelphia Eagles Sound Crew